My husband isn’t speaking to me lately. He is upset at something that I have done. I have not cheated on him, I have not extravagantly spent his money or anything like that. However, I have done something which is so hurtful to him that I cannot even ask for forgiveness. I did it because I wanted to do it, because I could do it.
He lives in NYC due to his job and I am a student in Toronto so our relationship is “long distance”. We are unable to see each other often.
Everyday I try to have him converse with me, especially online. He will not. He cannot. He is hurt. Today, after many days, he comes online and messages me. He writes “hi”.
“hi” – One simple word from him. One simple word from him lit up my life. That one word from him made me the happiest girl in the world. I had everything that I could ever want and ever need during that moment. He is so beautiful. His heart, his soul, his spirit, it is all beautiful. I ask God for forgiveness for hurting one of his most beautiful creations. However, there is nothing that I can do to ease his pain and suffering.
I have always felt that the simple things in life make life worth living. But my life is clouded by my materialistic desires. Even my description of my happiness from him is in materialistic language, ” I had everything I could ever want and ever need during that moment.”
This makes me think. How much of life am I missing due to materialism? How much pain and suffering has materialism caused? How many more people are tangled in the web of materialism as the simple beauties and joys of life pass by unnoticed?
Is what we live truly life?